Content Marketing? Vaffanculo!* Try Discontent Marketing 

Some idiots wrote to me this morning saying "We couldn't find your name on Google" so as to sell me their dubious e-directory. Very clever. Go on Google and find 1.260 million mentions in 1.26 seconds. 

I never cease to wonder at the sloth and stupidity of marketers. 

They just can't be bothered to think. So to take away the pain of thought for corporate tossers and small business dabblers, new fads keep coming, like lumbering number 9 buses. 

The big difference is that the number 9 bus gets you where you want to go. 

These fads don't - and I've lived through them all. 

USP, database marketing - tarted up as CRM - Twitter, double your likes on Facebook, Pinterest and a bloody great stream of Apps. 

I sometimes think commission-only sales people are the only people who understand the real world. No sell, no eat. 

I met two on the train from London to Bristol the other day. They were French, and we shared a few drinks and ideas - plus some suggestions from me about where they could get a good meal. 

They sell incredibly expensive IT equipment - multi-million pound stuff. One said "Make the prospects feel the pain! Twist the knife!". 

I couldn't agree more. 

People buy for emotional reasons - the more emotion the better. Pile it on! 

But what does the Content Marketing Institute tell you? That if you just keep sending out helpful material that will do the trick. 

They say it is "the art of communicating with your customers and prospects without selling. It is non-interruption marketing. Instead of pitching your products or services, you are delivering information that makes your buyer more intelligent." 

But what does the Content Marketing Institute do? Go look them up. They sell. "Find out more" is their cry. 

Here are some home truths, learned with my money - and God alone knows how many millions of my clients'. 

Just sending out information without asking people to buy is like running ads that don't ask for a response. Bloody stupid. 

If you don't interrupt they don't pay attention. 

People are not thinking when they get your stuff. Even if they are intelligent - which many aren't in the first place. 

The entire premise of Content Marketing is that people don't like being sold to. In research they say they prefer articles and white papers and that stuff. 

What they prefer and what they do have nothing to do with each other. 

What works and what people like are two different things.

What they need and what they think they want are two different things. 

If you are interested in what customers are really like as opposed to high-falutin' horsesh*t for the gullible, let me show you some videos. 

There you'll see people who understand the realities of business - and see through the fads. 

*Very useful expression when infuriated by idiots. Look it up if not easily shocked.